A lot of my Facebook friends have been doing “X days of Gratitude”, and since we have just entered the holiday season (a time of year that typically makes me border clinical depression) I thought that maybe doing one of these challenges would help give me a boost. Except, it doesn’t really seem to be working out. Because, right now, I’m 0% grateful. Not 1.0×10^-n grateful, 0 grateful. Here’s why.
The full definition of grateful according to Merriam-Webster is:
1.a. appreciative of benefits received
1.b. expressing gratitude (e.g. grateful thanks)
2.a. affording pleasure or contentment
2.b. pleasing by comfort supplied, or discomfort alleviated
Right now, I’m not receiving an benefits. I’m in po-dunk town with a family that I kind of hate to take family pictures, when I could be at home with my fiance and my pittie puppies. This situation also affords little pleasure of contentment, and causes more discomfort than it alleviates. In many ways I’m not grateful right now, and I probably won’t be until the family/holiday season is over. Some times (like now) I feel so outsider to them it’s hard to feel like I get a benefit from them or that they offer some pleasure or contentment to my life.
On the other hand, I do feel thankful for them Because to be thankful is to be glad that something has happened or not happened, that something or someone exists. I’m thankful that they exist, and I’m thankful that I know them. I’m thankful that I get to spend time with them, even if we are all kind of grumpy and waiting to leave as soon as it’s socially acceptable.
So I think I will practice being thankful rather than being grateful this holiday season. Because I am thankful, every day.
*Edit: I am however deeply grateful for my puppy. Like ridiculously so.